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i feel like i'm getting ready to intentionally kill myself. like. after all the flurry of last week, i'm actually preparing to enter into another one just like it. it's a sick, sick thought, but how am i gonna gear myself up for the week if i don't get mentally prepared? garrh. i'm just gonna trust God to get me through this week, and the next and the next. if He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders i know my brother that He will carry youif He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders i know my sister that He will carry you He said come unto me all who are weary and i will give you rest i will just have to learn that and put it into practice. and i will also have to learn to do my qt first, not just as an afterthought. pffft. i will have to learn to love everyone and stop being bitchy. and watch what i say very carefully.anyhoo. i've had a pretty good weekend, was pretty slack which makes me feel guilty but it's over so i cant' do anything abt it now can i. good job, fidelia and gerald for your production(: ahhah. it was nice(: ok and now i shall go off and like. read my book or sthg. my eye is itchy you know. have a real good week everyone. and all the best for those pple getting back o level results this week! (tt means you, nic.) byee(:
Jesus Christ, I think upon Your sacrifice You became nothing, poured out to deathMany times, I've wondered at Your gift of life and I'm in that place once againAnd once again I look upon the cross where You diedI'm humbled by Your mercy and I'm broken insideOnce again I thank YouOnce again I pour out my lifeNow You are, exalted to the highest placeKing of the heavens, where one day I'll bowBut for now, I marvel at Your saving graceAnd I'm full of praise once again And once again I look upon the cross where You died I'm humbled by Your mercy and I'm broken insideOnce again I thank You once again I pour out my life
my head is spinning.too many things to process, whirring around inside my head. it annoys me, when it comes to a point where everything just mixes together in one solid mass. can't even sort out my thoughts, it takes awhile. not necessarily bad things though. some are good. some don't even make much of an impact on me, but they still stick around inside my head like a bad dream. but oh wells.it could be just like. my contacts. i mean, it's not like i havent' been wearing them for 11 straight hours now. or it could be sleepyness. it's good to know that God's in charge of everything in my life. "Nothing can be out of control when it's in God's control." i take that seriously. and i do think that without him, i would never have made it through. honestly, that flying tile piece in bio could have cut off my nose or something. (no thanks to melody for breaking it!!) so thank you God. it's a really comforting thought to know that he's always beside me. all the time. and yeah, that i can put all my trust in him. (:amazing love how can it bethat you my king should die for meamazing love i know it's trueand it's my joy to honour youin all i doi honour youwill update more later maybe. i'm off to shower now. (:
I'm awake in the afternoonI fell asleep in the living roomand it's one of those momentswhen everything is so clearbefore the truth goes back into hidingI want to decide 'cause it's worth decidingto work on finding something more than this fear It takes so much out of me to pretend tell me now, tell me how to make amendsmaybe, I need to see the daylightto leave behind this half-lifedon't you see I'm breaking downlately, something here don't feel rightthis is just a half-lifeis there really no escapeno escape from time of any kind
"but i say to you who hear: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
Bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you.
To him who strikes you on the one cheek, offer the other also. And from him who takes away your cloak, do not withhold your tunic either.
Give to everyone who asks of you. and from him who takes away your goods do not ask them back.
And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise. but if you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? for even sinners love those who love them.
...
But love your enemies, do good, and lend, hoping for nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High. For He is kind to the unthankful and evil."
--luke6:27,28,29,30,31,35
(:
(ps:eliza! i stuck the template here MYSELF! hawhaww. nice?? any snide comments, char? hmmph.)
charmaine, did i ever tell you that I LOVE YOU TO BITS? coz i do, you know. you are like the only person i know who i could possibly have this conversation with: mu/' *i live for You alone. says:
i still feel like crying.
mu/' *i live for You alone. says:
say something wonky and make me laugh
like a rose, trampled on the ground; says:
my toes are long. and, yes, i did laugh. alot.
thanks for always being like that. for listening to me grumble about life's troubles and helping me laugh them all away(: i shudder to think what would have become of me if we hadn't become close friends after being split into 2m and 2e. (strange, isn't it, the way our friendship works?) thanks for your honesty, and your trust, and your wonderous cackle which can light up the room even on an already sunny day. thanks for sharing your own problems with me. thanks for sharing your roller coaster with me when i'm too cheapo/lazy to go get my own. ok so anyways. thank you so much for BRIGHTENING UP MY LIFE!
you rock.
and always will, i expect. (:
hmm. it feels weird, unearthing photos which were previously non-existant in my memory. i was totally unaware that i had a photo with my primary 6 chinese teacher (tan tat eng) and looking at her classic frown in the photo really brings back memories of primary school, and of how we used to gang up to make her life -well- a little more like hell. i can't even recall how she became my favourite teacher, especially after she bored the socks off all of us back in p5. but i have come to realise that i truly miss her, i miss her SO MUCH that even i can't believe it. looking at all those old photos, somehow i feel kinda sad. like i'm missing out on something... and maybe it's hard to face that those experiences and friendships are irretretrievable now. i've moved on to another phase in my life, just like everyone else has. and i guess everyone does miss their own "last times" at one point or another. and it's not like NOW does not have its perks. it's not like i'm unhappy now or anything morbid like that. but now that i look back, maybe i could have done more to treasure those experiences, and those pretty much carefree days where my only worry was tuition homework. everything was so simple and uncomplicated then. and i guess everything will get more complicated with time. naturally, that sucks, but at least i've got everyone suffering alongside me. i'm so gonna regret posting this entry. i'm gonna think what on earth was i thinking?! thank goodness my blog isn't a hot favourite. least ways, i hope it isn't. and, mdm tan tat eng, even though i know you'll never read this, (your IT skills are limited to han shen and calling rahman to rescue you) i'd like to tell you good job in helping all of us get through psle chinese, and thank you for bringing a little more joy into my life with your quirky ways. hope your new chinese new year clothes fit you well this time round, and that you've finally got a new pencilcase. god bless.
whoa. it's over! i can't believe i survived this week. i have survived the following: - 2 tingxie's - 1 chinese newspaper test - one chem test - one bio test - one maths test (that one may not survive eh.) - one ying yong wen - one zhouji - mep!!!!! - sunburn - about 2 truckloads of homework and piano and flute practice. - one chem practical with miss gk goh i rock. NOTICE that the vast majority of my homework is CHINESE. now. why could this be. *top five reasons why i have so much chinese homework*
1. my laoshi is sadistic
2. my laoshi is in a bad mood because she is gray (i kid you not)
3. my laoshi is in a bad mood because her hand aches from banging so loudly on the whiteboard with her marker (she actually SPOILT the marker. the tip went all the way in.)
4. my laoshi is trying to relive her childhood days because during her time, paper wasn't invented yet
5. she actually has good intentions and wants us to pass o level chinese. NAWW who am i kidding. with a voice that squeaky, who could have good intentions? they'll have driven themselves mad. anyways. chem practical was traumatic! i was so scared of miss goh, my hand was shaking so badly! the stupid hydrochloric acid in the stupid conical flask was SHAKING. with no required effort. seriously, if i tried singing at that moment, i'd have vibrato. then. i realised that i had one flask of hcl and one flask of alkali stuff, so i had to like wait till miss goh was facing the other way, then i totally GRABBED the stupid pipette and re-did the hcl bit. THANK GOODNESS she didn't catch me. but after that escapade, i was so flustered that when the burette (or however you spell it) was screwed up i totally panicked coz i felt so guilty. then miss goh nagged coz SHE thought i was rinsing it with the tap thing open. bahhhhh. chem is stressfull. but i love bio. (= elee loves my onion epidermal cells with shrunken cytoplasm. she told everyone to look at them in my microscope. HA. *gloat gloat* actually it was thanks to lydia, coz she flooded it too much. hahaha. i really miss 2m okay!!!! just that day i was thinking about that fantastic class, then i cried. i didn't even realise i miss it that much until then. awwww man. all those nice fun sweet people. especially sarah and liza and april cheryl nureen ger zw crys ming dee. sigh. i don't even get to talk to ger anymore coz she's not in mep and anyways she's got her own b2 friends. thank goodness sarah and nu have the same recesses so i get to eat with them, and they come down to visit and stuff. thank goodness for mep so i get to talk to all the rest. (much to miss tsien's dismay). sigh. what wouldn't i give to go back to last year. anyways, too all those people going for obs: ALL THE BEST TO YOU GUYS! have lots of fun yup, and don't forget to do qt and stuff like that even when you're sleeping in a smelly soggy tent. you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you! jiayou! (: btw. choir's slowly getting funner. (= dondang sayang dondang sayang.
*pheww* i'm so TIRED. i think if today wasn't a holiday, but a normal school day, i would be so dead. i just practiced piano for 2 hours you know. i feel so accomplished. and i ran 29.5 rounds the track this week!! i feel VERY accomplished! but i also feel quite painful. esp my legs. pffft. anyways, my work load is starting to steadily increase. i have like 4 tests next week! bahh. was supposed to go out with liza and the rest to study today but i don't feel like it coz i'm a bum. and i feel like staying at home, just for one day this week. i havent done that for a long time. AND. i forgot to do my qt yesterday and I FEEL VERY EVIL so i shall do for a longer time today. (= actually i feel like going back to sleep now but i shall be good and go study. soon. after typing this completely pointless entry. haven't been in an exceedingly good mood this week... feeling quite annoyed with my family actually. but i shall not elaborate coz i'm nice. yayy. minggy says she'll make me a template soon!! it's supposed to be lime green and black. yayy. i love minggy. AND. sonyakoo jelly's name has been altered a bit. it's now. SONNY ERIC'S-SON!!! hahaha. as in sony ericsson. SO AMUSING. muaahhah. ok i shall go now. THIS ENTRY IS COMPLETELY POINTLESS. i should have told you that before you started reading, shouldn't i? oh wells. (= toodles.
No more talk of darkness, Forget these wide-eyed fears. I'm here, nothing can harm you - my words will warm and calm you. Let me be your freedom, let daylight dry your tears. I'm here, with you, beside you, to guard you and to guide you Say you love me every waking moment,
turn my head with talk of summertime
Say you need me with you,
now and always
promise me that all you say is true -
that's all I ask of you Let me be your shelter,
let me be your light.
You're safe: No-one will find you
your fears are far behind you All I want is freedom,
a world with no more night
and you always beside me
to hold me and to hide me Then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime
Iet me lead you from your solitude
Say you need me with you here, beside you
anywhere you go,
let me go too -
that's all I ask
of you
sigh. i love phantom of the opera(:
mu
mgs, acjc
crapbaggang!
christian
(x
i feel like i'm getting ready to intentionally kill myself. like. after all the flurry of last week, i'm actually preparing to enter into another one just like it. it's a sick, sick thought, but how am i gonna gear myself up for the week if i don't get mentally prepared? garrh. i'm just gonna trust God to get me through this week, and the next and the next. if He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders i know my brother that He will carry youif He carried the weight of the world upon His shoulders i know my sister that He will carry you He said come unto me all who are weary and i will give you rest i will just have to learn that and put it into practice. and i will also have to learn to do my qt first, not just as an afterthought. pffft. i will have to learn to love everyone and stop being bitchy. and watch what i say very carefully.anyhoo. i've had a pretty good weekend, was pretty slack which makes me feel guilty but it's over so i cant' do anything abt it now can i. good job, fidelia and gerald for your production(: ahhah. it was nice(: ok and now i shall go off and like. read my book or sthg. my eye is itchy you know. have a real good week everyone. and all the best for those pple getting back o level results this week! (tt means you, nic.) byee(:
Jesus Christ, I think upon Your sacrifice You became nothing, poured out to deathMany times, I've wondered at Your gift of life and I'm in that place once againAnd once again I look upon the cross where You diedI'm humbled by Your mercy and I'm broken insideOnce again I thank YouOnce again I pour out my lifeNow You are, exalted to the highest placeKing of the heavens, where one day I'll bowBut for now, I marvel at Your saving graceAnd I'm full of praise once again And once again I look upon the cross where You died I'm humbled by Your mercy and I'm broken insideOnce again I thank You once again I pour out my life
my head is spinning.too many things to process, whirring around inside my head. it annoys me, when it comes to a point where everything just mixes together in one solid mass. can't even sort out my thoughts, it takes awhile. not necessarily bad things though. some are good. some don't even make much of an impact on me, but they still stick around inside my head like a bad dream. but oh wells.it could be just like. my contacts. i mean, it's not like i havent' been wearing them for 11 straight hours now. or it could be sleepyness. it's good to know that God's in charge of everything in my life. "Nothing can be out of control when it's in God's control." i take that seriously. and i do think that without him, i would never have made it through. honestly, that flying tile piece in bio could have cut off my nose or something. (no thanks to melody for breaking it!!) so thank you God. it's a really comforting thought to know that he's always beside me. all the time. and yeah, that i can put all my trust in him. (:amazing love how can it bethat you my king should die for meamazing love i know it's trueand it's my joy to honour youin all i doi honour youwill update more later maybe. i'm off to shower now. (:
I'm awake in the afternoonI fell asleep in the living roomand it's one of those momentswhen everything is so clearbefore the truth goes back into hidingI want to decide 'cause it's worth decidingto work on finding something more than this fear It takes so much out of me to pretend tell me now, tell me how to make amendsmaybe, I need to see the daylightto leave behind this half-lifedon't you see I'm breaking downlately, something here don't feel rightthis is just a half-lifeis there really no escapeno escape from time of any kind
"but i say to you who hear: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
Bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you.
To him who strikes you on the one cheek, offer the other also. And from him who takes away your cloak, do not withhold your tunic either.
Give to everyone who asks of you. and from him who takes away your goods do not ask them back.
And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise. but if you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? for even sinners love those who love them.
...
But love your enemies, do good, and lend, hoping for nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High. For He is kind to the unthankful and evil."
--luke6:27,28,29,30,31,35
(:
(ps:eliza! i stuck the template here MYSELF! hawhaww. nice?? any snide comments, char? hmmph.)
charmaine, did i ever tell you that I LOVE YOU TO BITS? coz i do, you know. you are like the only person i know who i could possibly have this conversation with: mu/' *i live for You alone. says:
i still feel like crying.
mu/' *i live for You alone. says:
say something wonky and make me laugh
like a rose, trampled on the ground; says:
my toes are long. and, yes, i did laugh. alot.
thanks for always being like that. for listening to me grumble about life's troubles and helping me laugh them all away(: i shudder to think what would have become of me if we hadn't become close friends after being split into 2m and 2e. (strange, isn't it, the way our friendship works?) thanks for your honesty, and your trust, and your wonderous cackle which can light up the room even on an already sunny day. thanks for sharing your own problems with me. thanks for sharing your roller coaster with me when i'm too cheapo/lazy to go get my own. ok so anyways. thank you so much for BRIGHTENING UP MY LIFE!
you rock.
and always will, i expect. (:
hmm. it feels weird, unearthing photos which were previously non-existant in my memory. i was totally unaware that i had a photo with my primary 6 chinese teacher (tan tat eng) and looking at her classic frown in the photo really brings back memories of primary school, and of how we used to gang up to make her life -well- a little more like hell. i can't even recall how she became my favourite teacher, especially after she bored the socks off all of us back in p5. but i have come to realise that i truly miss her, i miss her SO MUCH that even i can't believe it. looking at all those old photos, somehow i feel kinda sad. like i'm missing out on something... and maybe it's hard to face that those experiences and friendships are irretretrievable now. i've moved on to another phase in my life, just like everyone else has. and i guess everyone does miss their own "last times" at one point or another. and it's not like NOW does not have its perks. it's not like i'm unhappy now or anything morbid like that. but now that i look back, maybe i could have done more to treasure those experiences, and those pretty much carefree days where my only worry was tuition homework. everything was so simple and uncomplicated then. and i guess everything will get more complicated with time. naturally, that sucks, but at least i've got everyone suffering alongside me. i'm so gonna regret posting this entry. i'm gonna think what on earth was i thinking?! thank goodness my blog isn't a hot favourite. least ways, i hope it isn't. and, mdm tan tat eng, even though i know you'll never read this, (your IT skills are limited to han shen and calling rahman to rescue you) i'd like to tell you good job in helping all of us get through psle chinese, and thank you for bringing a little more joy into my life with your quirky ways. hope your new chinese new year clothes fit you well this time round, and that you've finally got a new pencilcase. god bless.
whoa. it's over! i can't believe i survived this week. i have survived the following: - 2 tingxie's - 1 chinese newspaper test - one chem test - one bio test - one maths test (that one may not survive eh.) - one ying yong wen - one zhouji - mep!!!!! - sunburn - about 2 truckloads of homework and piano and flute practice. - one chem practical with miss gk goh i rock. NOTICE that the vast majority of my homework is CHINESE. now. why could this be. *top five reasons why i have so much chinese homework*
1. my laoshi is sadistic
2. my laoshi is in a bad mood because she is gray (i kid you not)
3. my laoshi is in a bad mood because her hand aches from banging so loudly on the whiteboard with her marker (she actually SPOILT the marker. the tip went all the way in.)
4. my laoshi is trying to relive her childhood days because during her time, paper wasn't invented yet
5. she actually has good intentions and wants us to pass o level chinese. NAWW who am i kidding. with a voice that squeaky, who could have good intentions? they'll have driven themselves mad. anyways. chem practical was traumatic! i was so scared of miss goh, my hand was shaking so badly! the stupid hydrochloric acid in the stupid conical flask was SHAKING. with no required effort. seriously, if i tried singing at that moment, i'd have vibrato. then. i realised that i had one flask of hcl and one flask of alkali stuff, so i had to like wait till miss goh was facing the other way, then i totally GRABBED the stupid pipette and re-did the hcl bit. THANK GOODNESS she didn't catch me. but after that escapade, i was so flustered that when the burette (or however you spell it) was screwed up i totally panicked coz i felt so guilty. then miss goh nagged coz SHE thought i was rinsing it with the tap thing open. bahhhhh. chem is stressfull. but i love bio. (= elee loves my onion epidermal cells with shrunken cytoplasm. she told everyone to look at them in my microscope. HA. *gloat gloat* actually it was thanks to lydia, coz she flooded it too much. hahaha. i really miss 2m okay!!!! just that day i was thinking about that fantastic class, then i cried. i didn't even realise i miss it that much until then. awwww man. all those nice fun sweet people. especially sarah and liza and april cheryl nureen ger zw crys ming dee. sigh. i don't even get to talk to ger anymore coz she's not in mep and anyways she's got her own b2 friends. thank goodness sarah and nu have the same recesses so i get to eat with them, and they come down to visit and stuff. thank goodness for mep so i get to talk to all the rest. (much to miss tsien's dismay). sigh. what wouldn't i give to go back to last year. anyways, too all those people going for obs: ALL THE BEST TO YOU GUYS! have lots of fun yup, and don't forget to do qt and stuff like that even when you're sleeping in a smelly soggy tent. you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you! jiayou! (: btw. choir's slowly getting funner. (= dondang sayang dondang sayang.
*pheww* i'm so TIRED. i think if today wasn't a holiday, but a normal school day, i would be so dead. i just practiced piano for 2 hours you know. i feel so accomplished. and i ran 29.5 rounds the track this week!! i feel VERY accomplished! but i also feel quite painful. esp my legs. pffft. anyways, my work load is starting to steadily increase. i have like 4 tests next week! bahh. was supposed to go out with liza and the rest to study today but i don't feel like it coz i'm a bum. and i feel like staying at home, just for one day this week. i havent done that for a long time. AND. i forgot to do my qt yesterday and I FEEL VERY EVIL so i shall do for a longer time today. (= actually i feel like going back to sleep now but i shall be good and go study. soon. after typing this completely pointless entry. haven't been in an exceedingly good mood this week... feeling quite annoyed with my family actually. but i shall not elaborate coz i'm nice. yayy. minggy says she'll make me a template soon!! it's supposed to be lime green and black. yayy. i love minggy. AND. sonyakoo jelly's name has been altered a bit. it's now. SONNY ERIC'S-SON!!! hahaha. as in sony ericsson. SO AMUSING. muaahhah. ok i shall go now. THIS ENTRY IS COMPLETELY POINTLESS. i should have told you that before you started reading, shouldn't i? oh wells. (= toodles.
No more talk of darkness, Forget these wide-eyed fears. I'm here, nothing can harm you - my words will warm and calm you. Let me be your freedom, let daylight dry your tears. I'm here, with you, beside you, to guard you and to guide you Say you love me every waking moment,
turn my head with talk of summertime
Say you need me with you,
now and always
promise me that all you say is true -
that's all I ask of you Let me be your shelter,
let me be your light.
You're safe: No-one will find you
your fears are far behind you All I want is freedom,
a world with no more night
and you always beside me
to hold me and to hide me Then say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime
Iet me lead you from your solitude
Say you need me with you here, beside you
anywhere you go,
let me go too -
that's all I ask
of you
sigh. i love phantom of the opera(:
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