Monday, August 07, 2006
Dearest Ms Goh,
today when Ms Ho told us that you were gone, i really couldn't believe, couldn't imagine it. my mind went completely blank. coz you're Ms Goh! the one who always had the strength to get up and come to school to teach, even on bad days. especially on bad days. (and it was on bad days that you smiled the most.) knowing that you had become a Catholic last easter was indeed a comforting thought, but there are so many things i wanted to say to you and never got a chance. i guess i always took it for granted, thinking that a thank you letter on teachers day wouldn't be quite as odd as one out of the blue. well i guess i won't be sending you a teachers day card after all. but i'd like to believe that somehow, you can still know my thoughts, can still see how thankful i am to you and for you.
thank you miss Goh. thank you for teaching 3b3 chemistry. for putting all your efforts in despite your illness, even conducting remedial sessions during the holidays. thank you for never giving up on us, even when we achieved shameful grades of almost nothing upon 25 for tests. thank you for teaching us not only chemistry, but things like responsibility, punctuality, diligence and above all, sitting with our legs closed. thank you for never failing to see the good in people, for treating us to ice cream, for bringing little snacks for us during those long remedial sessions. thank you for the laughs, the jokes, the sighing and exclamations of "SUKU!" and "AS LAZY AS A WORM!" never forgetting your number one favourite word: "HALLO..."
at the same time, i'm sorry. i'm sorry i never made that big an effort to make things easier for you. i'm sorry i didn't get that a1 in chem for sec 3 end of years. i'm sorry i never thanked you earlier.
i remember once you asked me to walk you to the staff room from the LT because you were so afraid of the Bangla Men... you told me you were in a great deal of pain, but you told yourself to come to school, just so you could teach us, help us to get a firm foundation of chemistry. that point was the time when i began to see you in a new light, and i began to really admire you. people with such strength, such courage, and such a big heart like you have are rare, and i really do feel honoured to have known you and be taught by you.
for sec 3 end of years, i only got 52%. i fully expected you to be disappointed in me; even i was disappointed in myself! yet you encouraged me, saying "good, good" and telling me to continue to work hard, believing always that i could do well for o level chem.
well, Ms Goh, i'm not gonna let you down. i promise i'll work hard, i promise i'll do my best to get that a1. anything less doesn't reflect all you've done for me, all you've done for us.
i really thank God for letting me know such an awesome woman as you. although i miss you, and i wish you were still here, i know that one day we're gonna meet again, and then i shall thank you in person. for now, as Shermaine says, you wouln't want me to cry. you'd want me to move on, to concentrate on studying for my prelims. well, i'm going to try ms Goh, but you know, forgetting about a person like you, is gonna be one of the hardest things i've ever done.
thank you once again.
much love,
muriel